
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
On the set of Walker Texas Ranger Chuck Norris brought a dying lamb back to life by nuzzling it with his beard. As the onlookers gathered, the lamb sprang to life. Chuck Norris then roundhouse kicked it, killing it instantly. This was just to prove that the good Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.
Chuck Norris went looking for a bar but couldn't find one. He walked to a vacant lot and sat there. Sure enough within an hour an a half someone constructed a bar around him. He then ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Chuck Norris yelled over the roar of the flames, "always leave things the way you found em!"
When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.
chuck norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
when Chuck Noris jumps in a pool, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Noris.
chuck norris played russian roulette with a fully loaded gun and won
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.
Chuck Norris doesn't own a can opener, he just chews through the can.
Chuck Norris can taste lies.